disintegrate

rate

yea. so long no blog. everything is fine i suppose... erm. audition is fine. it's on Monday. holy shit. but it's over. yea. so...... tat week was.. i forgot. HAHA! yeps. den.. Fridae's CO my gu zhen was SHIT. i emphasis, SHIT. yes. my hand was trembling and those stuffs. came out wrong beat. wrong notes. bla bla... yeaps. den Saturday didnt go out. wasnt realli happy abt it. den sunday went out. erms.. kinda quarrelled. duno y... always so mani girls calling him. i feel so wad lohs. den he say isst tat he mus del all their numbers den i am happy. i mean lyk.. come on lohs. u bear to del den say lohs. dun tell mi empty words. den Saturday i sms him den he tot i his mei. how fucked i feel lohs. jus feel so fucked lohs. yea. i wanna revenge. but, for wad? yea. wad for. i mean.. i dun think he gets jealous over anithing. and i think he is finding mi childish and blah stuffs. aiyaa. dun care le lohs. and. he's such a blockhead with the least romance included. yea. forget it...

tml visit to ngee ann poly.. so cool. i cant wait. yea. early childhood. i hope i dun see Ronnie or William. or i'll run off lyk shit. i will shun them off. luckily i change number they duno. -smirks.

erms.. i feel tat.. relationship wise.... i am comment-less lohs. but tat Sunday was kinda funny yeps. sms and those stuffs. yea.. actually he was sweet larhs. haha. i shant ask much. yea. erms... i duno lehs. jus feel lyk... sometyms i tell him sch things. den lyk he keep on ya and all those. and his reply tells mi tat i'm so friggin childish. yea. sighs. maybe it's all wad I feel. I is very impt here. i dun see things as WE. sighs. but how u wan mi to lyk not worry when so mani girls calling him lehs... haiz. and lyk... all tell him his probs. so fucked. yea. tats wad i feel. but he feels tat jus frds loh. i shall TRY to remain and think tat its frd lohs. sighs. but i veri wad one lohs. so petty de. sure will not think tat its frd even tho i knoe it is. especially if it is her. DUHS!

someone has been miss calling my phone. and i cant hear the phone cos its so soft lohs. and tyat tym got number. i dare not call back. now no number. more worse. i think its the gu zhen teacher. yea! i going bak for one last lesson before i am ready for the SYF. yeps. so sadded. cannot see her le. i think i'll miss CO alot alot.. sighs.. miss it lyk shit lorhs. =\\ sighs.

i nid to get so mani things... sighs. i nid 2 shirt. 1 skirt/jeans. 1 sch bag. 1 pencil case.. sighs. my bag i scared any time spoil lohs. den jus now i tell my mother. she say y i nid to buy so mani things. cos on sunday suppose to buy things. den was kinda spoilt by the quarrels. so i spent the money. left $30. den my mom say spend so much. den i was lyk i keep staying back in sch. and yesterday i spent $10 on the pasar malam food for them lohs. so much for being KIND. den she say lyk i use so much den suppose to buy clothings bcome i use. den she say i hafta wait end of the month when she gets her pay. den i was lyk hu ask u buy her shoes until $120. i mean i was referring to my sis. yea. so ex lohs. den she came in. den she say she wanna look at my bag. den i was lyk dun wan la. i dun wan buy oreadi. i was kinda pissed. den later she say i throw tantrum. fuck shit.. den she say $30 buy sch bag. where to find sch bag which is $30 now u tell mi.. i am eyeing the one at hereen. it's $60. wth...... i haf $30 with mi. den if together $60. but if i use and buy bag without telling her, i'd be scolded lyk hell. yea. aiyaa.. duno lahs. headache!!

dear is still out with Thomas i guess. and i think he will call mi but onli talk awhile. i shall be mighty pissed with him. jus wait and see. hehe.

i duno wad brought the sudden change. but i cant stand u sometyms. i do feel lyk telling u straight in the face. but i fear the consequences. if u can do it, y cant i? we r both humans and we haf both our rights. u dun need to show off to mi cos i, too, haf wad u haf. maybe u should cherish it more than to flaunt it. and, tats the thing any partner should do.